How to Host an Elegant Afternoon Tea With a Modern Twist – 5 Expert Steps to a Timelessly Chic Event
Afternoon tea is a wonderfully sophisticated and uplifting tradition, which you can put your own spin on with this advice from hosts and etiquette experts


Afternoon tea might be a wonderful excuse to gather some friends and show off the teapot you found at a flea market, but so much of its charm lies in its illustrious heritage. The custom dates back as far as 1840, when England's seventh Duchess of Bedford began to request a light meal (and a pot of tea) between lunch and dinner. Soon, the British upper classes were hooked.
These days, gowns and fine china aren't a prerequisite; and since afternoon tea is no longer a fixed part of the day, it has evolved into a more deliberate and thoughtful affair. Take designer Bryan Graybill's afternoon tea ritual: loose leaf tea at 4pm, brewed in a vintage teapot. To him, 'it marks a pause in the day’s work and commitments. It matters because it creates rhythm – ceremony without fuss.'
At its heart, afternoon tea is a historic British tradition – but there are so many ways to bring it into the modern day. Whether you're desperate to recreate the classic Victorian experience, you want to bring some glamor to your next gathering, or you're just looking for a reason to bake some scones, here's how to host an afternoon tea, according to the experts.
1. Set the Scene
Begin with one aim in mind: producing a feeling of understated elegance. Think about your hosting style and the look you'd like to create, whether you lean towards a vintage-inspired tablescape or a more rustic setting.
A simple tablecloth can make all the difference. Tradition dictates something lacy or embroidered, often featuring an intricate botanical motif, but there are some beautiful non-chintzy styles (take the gorgeous Sintra tablecloth from Serena and Lily, for example). As Bryan Graybill notes, it isn't about grandeur or spectacle, but simply 'creating an atmosphere of ease'.
Flowers can be a wonderful starting point, too – a simple hydrangea centerpiece or a dahlia table arrangement can instantly bring a sense of sophistication to your table with minimal effort.
2. Choose a Menu Guided by Tradition
Table decor is your foundation, but the star of every afternoon tea is, of course, the menu. According to Maya McKinney from the TwenTea Company, hosts should 'start with light savories (like cucumber-herb or smoked salmon), move to warm scones with cream and jam, and finish with mini desserts such as lemon tartlets or macarons.’
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It's a joy to craft your treats by hand, but if you're pressed for time, you can always add finishing touches to shop-bought cakes and scones; think extra toppings and edible flowers for a refined take.
'Everything is typically sized so that it can be eaten in just a few bites,' explains etiquette expert Nick Leighton. However, he continues, 'if you don't want to stick with tradition, however, that's fine: after all, no one can resist warm chocolate chip cookies or brownies on a platter.'
3. Give Your Afternoon Tea a Modern Twist
It's always a good idea to set up your afternoon tea with tradition in mind, but that doesn't mean you can't experiment.
‘Traditionally, tea would be served somewhere between 2pm and 4pm, but who doesn't like a nice beverage and tasty nibbles in the middle of the day?' reflects Nick. 'It can be for any occasion or no occasion – it's lovely for birthdays, showers, a cozy book club evening, or really any afternoon gathering.’
A contemporary afternoon tea is often a more laid-back experience: why not ask your guests to bring treats to share (for a twist on hosting a potluck) and use mismatched china as serveware, instead of a traditional matching set.
4. Bring in Considered Details
A truly impressive afternoon tea is all about the thoughtful details. Add handwritten place cards and name card holders like these heirloom silver ones from William Sonoma; tuck sprigs of seasonal foliage into simple napkin rings (we like these white stoneware napkin rings from Crate & Barrel); and finish by displaying your desserts on an elegant cake stand (like this cream scalloped cake stand from Magnolia).
Even the most unassuming pieces in your hosting closet can become thoughtful additions to an afternoon tea tablescape; cream taper candles, for example, are the perfect Victorian-inspired detail. As Bryan notes: 'It doesn’t need to be grand, just deliberate.'
5. Offer a Choice of Elevated Drinks
The classic afternoon tea experience will always involve loose leaf tea, usually brewed in an ornate teapot (like this berry and thread teapot from Bloomingdale's) using a tea strainer (you can pick one up on Amazon like the Teabloom universal tea infuser). It's the tea that creates a real sense of ceremony; as Bryan reflects, it's 'one of the few rituals left that engages all the senses without requiring screens or spectacle.'
If you're hosting a crowd, it's best to provide a variety of drinks. 'Offer a selection for guests to choose from, including something that's caffeine-free,' says Nick. 'Serve milk, sugar, and lemon slices to go with it, and you can also serve coffee, too.'
For a truly memorable touch, pour glasses of Champagne or prepare a seasonal cocktail such as a spiced pear belini. Ice cubes with berries or flowers are another lovely touch that shows you’ve really put in the effort.
Shop Everything You Need to Host an Afternoon Tea
If there's ever an occasion to showcase a tablecloth adorned with bows, it's an afternoon tea. Accessorize with silver taper candlesticks and antique flatware.
Delightfully pared-back and yet gracefully detailed, these broderie napkins will tie together every kind of tablescape. Use ribbons instead of napkin rings for an added flourish.
Chargers are guaranteed to elevate your table settings – and there are endless options to choose from. This rattan charger is rustic and yet refined.
Every afternoon tea part needs some delicate porcelain and these embossed appetizer plates are ideal for a simple yet elevated touch.
Tea cups and saucers are, naturally, the basis of any afternoon tea, and this floral set is ideal for a country grandmother-inspired tableware look.
Simple and utterly timeless, this cake stand is the perfect addition to an afternoon tea spread. Pile it with cakes and it becomes a spectacular centerpiece.

Martha is a Content Editor on the Living team at Homes & Gardens. Her love for lifestyle journalism began when she interned at Time Out Dubai when she was 15 years old; she went on to study English and German at Oxford, before covering property and interior design at Country & Town House magazine. To Martha, living beautifully is all about good food and lots of colorful home decor.
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