How to Infuse Soul Into Your Space and Make Your Home Feel Like You

Interior designer Ashley Montgomery is one of Homes & Gardens' new Editors-At-Large for By Design, sharing her thoughts on decor. See the rest of her articles here.

There’s a certain feeling that hits when you walk into a home that’s truly lived in. Not the messy, socks-on-the-floor kind of lived-in (though we’ve all been there), but the deeply comforting, ‘I could stay here forever’ kind.

Growing up, people often said – and still do – that my parents’ house felt like a warm hug. I never fully understood what that meant until I started designing myself. That’s when I realized it was exactly the feeling I wanted to come home to: spaces that carry stories in their corners and warmth in their bones. They’re not necessarily polished or perfect, but they have soul – and that, my friend, makes all the difference.

I’m often asked how to create that feeling with your home decor ideas. The good news? It doesn’t require a huge budget or a full-scale renovation. Soul isn’t something you buy. It’s collected, layered, lived in – and most importantly, it takes time.

There’s no secret how-to guide for creating soul in a space. Chances are, you already have everything you need – it’s just tucked on a shelf or packed away in the basement. Sometimes, it’s simply about seeing things a little differently. Not for what they were, like the box labeled ‘fancy china for guests only,’ but for what they could be – daily reminders of meaning and memory.

It often starts with something old. Not necessarily antique-store fancy, just something with a bit of history. Maybe it’s the salvaged table you found on the side of the road and dragged home because you couldn’t stop running your hand over its worn edges (we’ve all been there, right?). Or a vintage mirror, gilded and slightly foxed, that catches the morning light just so. These pieces don’t just fill space – they bring presence. They hold time. A room immediately feels more grounded, more human, when it contains something that has seen things. I swear, you can feel the stories living inside these pieces.

But soul isn’t just in the big gestures. It lives in the quiet, everyday details too. Like using your grandmother’s silver flatware on a Tuesday night just because. No special occasion required other than reflecting on the day’s events. Use it every day. Make your everyday feel a little more special. These aren’t museum pieces; they’re memory-makers. They remind us where we came from, and when we use them, those moments become part of our daily rhythm. Honestly, a bowl of cereal just hits differently when eaten with a spoon that’s older than you are.

I’ve also come to believe that your home should whisper your story, not shout a trend. Some may say ‘grandmillennial’ or ‘vintage’ is having a moment right now, but I wouldn’t call it a trend. I’d call it an appreciation for things we’ve always had – we just didn’t know how to use them.

A hand-written recipe card from your mom can be framed and hung in the kitchen, turning something humble into a little shrine of sentiment, butter stains and all. That old flannel shirt of your dad’s you’ve been holding onto? Turn it into a cushion. Let the things you love become part of the landscape.

Texture, too, plays a starring role. It’s the unspoken layer of comfort. Think linen curtains catching the breeze, a velvet chair that insists you sit down and stay awhile, a nubby wool rug underfoot that makes your morning coffee just a little cozier. Don’t overthink it – just mix what you love. If it feels good, it belongs.

Layered textures make a space feel thoughtful and real, even when it’s not perfect. (Which, let’s be honest, it never really is. And thank goodness for that.)

There’s something beautifully liberating about letting your home evolve slowly. You don’t need to ‘finish’ a room in a weekend. In fact, please don’t. Let it breathe. Let it gather stories. Pick up a piece here and there – a ceramic bowl from a weekend market, a painting that makes you feel something, even if you’re not quite sure what. These are the things that give a space its heartbeat.

Rome wasn’t built in a day… and neither is your home.

And when something doesn’t feel quite right? Trust your gut. If it doesn’t make you smile, sigh, or remember something special – it probably doesn’t need to stay. Creating a home with soul is more about subtraction than perfection. Keep what matters. Let the rest go.

In the end, soulful homes aren’t styled – they’re loved into being. They carry fingerprints, flaws, textures, and tales. They hold pieces of where we’ve been and quietly make space for where we’re going.

And really – isn’t that what home is all about?